New Mama struggles & how I dealt with it!

Below are some things I've had to learn and deal with being a new Mom! I'm hoping by the time I have a 2nd child, I can read back through this and laugh! 

39 Weeks Prego with Elizabeth Ann!

PREGNANCY:
I found out I was pregnant in April of 2011. It was a bit of a shocker considering I had my wedding all planned out by then and set the date in August of 2011. That made me 5 months pregnant at my own wedding. Needless to say, I was pretty upset. I'm naturally a small person and now I was gaining weight ( which my mother-in-law was sure to tell me!) every week and getting bigger by the minute. Don't get me wrong! I've wanted to be a Mama for as long as I could remember, just not that soon! Of course, my entire family told me "Babies come when they want."  
Have a good support system!
So, being pregnant and getting married and trying to figure everything out was pretty emotional for me. My hormones were going nuts and I wanted to tell everyone to shut the #*&^ up! I knew I couldn't trust my own brain and immediately took my problems to other people, and I'm so glad I did. On top of having a wonderful  family and a maid of honor willing to go out of her way to meet me for morning coffee before work everyday; I had a fantastic doctor and nurse who were not only concerned for the health of my baby, but asked me over and over again how III was doing and "coping." It was nice to be able to talk to someone out of the "family circle". If you don't like your doctor/midwife/etc, go find one that you do! If it takes you a few to go through, it's worth it!

NURSING:
I almost feel kinda guilty for saying I've "struggled" with nursing. My Elizabeth Ann had no problems latching from minute 1 and ate from both boobs right away! I never had issues with milk supply and actually over produced a bit. I was a constant "leaker". I actually started leaking colostrum a few months before Elizabeth was born. The problem was everyone else. Starting from day 1. After having Elizabeth, the hospital we were at had a tub ( something I longed for SO bad during my pregnancy but do not have) so, I of course, decided to take a nice bath before going home. After I was done, I came out to my find my husband literally shoving a bottle down Elizabeth's throat and a nurse nagging him from behind saying the "choking" is normal and she will get used to it. Elizabeth was a 5lb baby, pretty small but full term and completely healthy! I'm a pretty quiet person when it comes to voicing my opinion so I just sat in bed and glared as my husband tried to feed our daughter who was clearly full from the 3-4 times I had already nursed her! The nurse took this as a " OMG! She isn't eating and is tiny! You may have to keep her here at the hospital for a while!" Once she mentioned staying at the hospital longer I perked up and tried to tell her " Hey, I nursed. She isn't hungry right now..." and she replied with " If you're having problems nursing, we have a lactation nurse on call if you'd like to call her." Make sure whatever hospital you're at, home, etc knows what your plan is for feeding before the baby is born, after the baby is born and repeatedly! Voice your opinion, it's your child! 

Milk coma at 1 month old! 

Being a somewhat modest person, I was having problems pulling out my boobs out 24/7 to feed Elizabeth.
For the first few months I'd leave the room if anyone was present and found a quiet place to feed her. My boss had then given me a beautiful nursing cover that was a complete lifesaver for me! Elizabeth hated it and we eventually stopped using it unless we were in public or around people we didn't know. On top of being modest, I had a constant nagging brother who would yell at me when I'd feed her, a few friends who were actually disgusted at the fact I was feeding my child, even with the cover, and stares from people I didn't know who looked at me as if I was doing something horrible to my child. This was especially bad in the later months as I breastfed Elizabeth until she was 13 months old and at night until she was 16 months.
I now know when I have my 2nd child, to expect stares of disgust but to shrug them off. These people are ignorant. I don't plan to be one of those Mama's who pops her boob out in the middle of the grocery line, but I do plan to breastfeed proudly and if someone has the balls to tell me otherwise ( again!) I will have no problem telling them off this time!

GOING BACK TO WORK:
Before Elizabeth was born, I had a great full-time job working 8-5, weekends off, being an office assistant. It was a great job for me and I truly enjoyed it. As promised, after Elizabeth was born, I had 3 months of maternity leave. I hadn't expected how hard it was going to be to go back. On top of being completely attached, emotionally and half the time physically, to Elizabeth, I was exclusively breastfeeding which means I'd have to get Elizabeth to start taking a bottle - which I had been unsuccessful previously. I joined the Mom365 site a few months earlier and this was a good time for me to start up a discussion and see what other Mom's were doing when going back to work. Many mother's were saying " If your baby is truly hungry, she will eat! Don't worry!" So, I decided to go back part-time and only have MY mother and mother-in-law watch her. I just couldn't do it. I worried the entire time and couldn't concentrate on my work. I kept getting calls and texts saying she refused to eat and that I needed to come home. After a few months of trying to work part-time, my boss ( A mother of 3 herself) and I both agreed it would be best if I quit and stayed home with Elizabeth. It was such a hard decision for my husband and I. We were so used to BOTH incomes and now we had to rely on his only. Completely worth it to be with my child! We're still adjusting to it but have managed to stay out of debt by cutting down on basically everything. We rarely go out to eat - if we do it's a special occasion. We also shop at our local QFC where we get a great discount for signing up for their card.
When Elizabeth turned 10 months old my friend offered a job with her, working 1 day a week in our home town. So I now I work 1 day a week whenever my mother has a day off. When Elizabeth was still nursing, this current job was so close to home, my Mom was able to stop by at lunch time so I could nurse Elizabeth! It's been great to have the few extra dollars we lived without for many months! I've also decided to create an Etsy account since I'm doing crafts all day anyways!

STAYING HOME:

A mama deer & 1 of her 2 babies that live in my back yard! 

I know it sounds crazy. "She struggles staying at home? It must be soooo hard *sarcasm*". It's a lot different than what I was used too! I used to be free! I now have devoted ALL my time to my child! I love it, but it's a lot different and did get some getting used too. My husband and I only have 1 working vehicle now, which means Elizabeth and I are literally stuck at home. I get quite lonely. As much as I love chatting with my toddler, she doesn't have the communication skills an adult has. Ha ha. I'm lucky enough to live about a block away from my parent's where my little brother and little sister still live so we can take walks up there to visit and hopefully I can get in some adult interaction. We also do a lot of crafts and go outside whenever the weather permits! If it gets us out of the house, we are usually up for it!

I think the most important thing I've learned from being a Mom for 18 months now, is that every child is different. Every parent is different. Some things work for you, and some things don't. I found that I was beating myself up over little things because one parent was doing something completely different than I was; but what they were doing, didn't work for Elizabeth. Just because you do it a different way, doesn't mean it's wrong! Trial and error is half of being a new Mom and it can only get better from here! :)